The Bellbind Letters: Inside the Devil's Plan for Your Motherhood

 

I'm honored to be part of the launch team for The Bellbind Letters: Inside the Devil's Plan for Your Motherhood by Samantha Stepheson. 

In C.S. Lewis’ classic epistolary novel The Screwtape Letters, Screwtape is a senior demon teaching Wormwood, a younger demon, the art of temptation. In The Bellbind Letters: Inside the Devil’s Plan for Your Motherhood, Samantha Stephenson takes that format and centers the instruction on how the devil, referred to as “Our Father Below,” wants to keep mothers from following God, a.k.a. “The Enemy.” According to Stephenson, “this book seeks to emulate Lewis’s rhetorical brilliance in order to highlight the temptations Christian mothers face on the road to sanctity.”

This is an extremely well-written book that sheds light on the many temptations mothers face in their everyday lives. It is entertaining to read but also forces mothers to look at their own faults and failings, which is never a pleasant experience. It is meant to be an uncomfortable book, a literary examination of conscience, designed to have you running to the Lord for mercy and forgiveness.

Stephenson acknowledges that it can be difficult to have our weaknesses exposed and encourages mothers to “resist the urge to accuse or despair.” Rather, we should “surrender all our broken pieces to the tender mercy of Christ the healer, who makes all things new.” This is true, but it is much easier said than done, and as I read the letters in this book, I couldn’t help but feel discouraged, which I suppose simply illustrates the point that the devil is at work in my life.

The letters cover a wide variety of topics and situations that a mother might face. Prayer, screen use, rest, consumerism, vanity, friendship, attending Mass, dealing with the challenges of pregnancy, the pain of miscarriage, loving one’s husband, taking care of a home, devotion to Mary and the saints, caring for children, and anxiety are some of the topics covered. In most cases, Boomslang encourages Bellbind to get the mother to follow something other than a middle virtuous path, to veer to one extreme or the other.

For example, when it comes to caring for one’s appearance, there is the temptation to put too much emphasis on it, but there is also the temptation not to care about it at all. When it comes to rest, mothers should not feel that they are so important that they can’t leave their families to take time for themselves, but on the other hand, taking too much time away is wrong. When parenting one’s children, one can be either too strict or too permissive. One can either reject the inherent gifts of femininity or embrace them so much that one looks down on those who don’t live up to feminine ideals. One can devote oneself to being a mother to the exclusion of everything else or not spend enough time and energy on motherhood.

The Bellbind Letters is a worthwhile Lenten read. While you read, you can reflect on your life and the ways you struggle as a wife and mother. It can help you recognize how the devil may be tempting you away from the holy path. You may wish to keep a list of sins to bring to the Sacrament of Reconciliation. There is a discussion guide in the appendix, and Stephenson offers an additional letter and study guide at https://www.snstephenson.com/bellbind.

 

#OpenBook for March 2024

 Welcome to #OpenBook. I'm joining up with Carolyn Astfalk who hosts an #OpenBook Linkup on CatholicMom.com. Here's what I've been reading this past month. The dates indicate when I finished the books. Thanks for stopping by!

 

2-9-24 Befriending St. Joseph: Finding Faith, Hope, and Courage in the Seven Sorrows Devotion - Deacon Greg Kandra - St. Joseph's feast day is March 19th. This book would make for wonderful spiritual reading or an at-home retreat during this month. It offers short chapters that reflect on the seven times St. Joseph is mentioned in Scripture. Learn more about St. Joseph and the lessons he has to teach us. It also offers several prayers to use to ask for St. Joseph's intercession in our time of need.

 2-11-24 One Thousand Gifts - Ann Voskamp - I learned about this book from a review on CatholicMom.com.  Ann embraced gratefulness as a way to counteract the bitterness in her life and as a way to reflect on Eucharist (which means Thanksgiving). She is a nondenominational Christian so her understanding of Eucharist is different than a Catholic one, but there are some similarities. She reflects on being grateful in times of trial (she has had more than her share of trauma). I found her writing style a bit disjointed in parts (this was a New York Times bestseller - many people evidently disagree with me), but I loved the idea and it was just what I needed because I was looking for something to do for Lent for the prayer component. Thanksgiving is a form of prayer. I'm going to try to make my own list of 1000 things to be grateful for - 25 per day for 40 days. I have no idea if I will manage this or not, but I'm going to try.

 

2-15-24 The Song of Sourwood Mountain - Ann H. Gabhart - Mira Dean’s fiance died five years earlier, along with her dreams of being a wife and mother, but she enjoys her life as a schoolteacher in Louisville. When a former classmate she hasn't seen in years, a missionary in Appalachia, asks her to marry him and be a teacher to the children of Sourwood, she thinks the idea is preposterous. However, when circumstances conspire against her, she realizes that God wants her to accept his offer. This was a lovely story of following God's will, even when it takes you to unexpected places. (Read for a book review publication) 

2-17-24 Life in Five Senses - Gretchen Rubin - This book went along nicely with the gratitude project I'm doing for Lent. It was all Rubin's quest to appreciate the world more through her five main senses of sight, hearing, taste, smell, and touch. It encourages paying more attention to how we experience the world.  

 

2-19-24 1000 Words: A Writer's Guide to Staying Creative, Focused, and Productive All Year Round - Jame Attenberg - This book is partly reflections on the writing life by the author and partly a collection of essays on writing by other authors. Some of the writers I had heard of; others I had not. Many of the essays had been written during the pandemic and spoke of isolation or the struggle to write when their personal circumstances had been upended. I enjoyed reading the different essays, although a few of them used some vulgarity. Basically, the purpose of the book was to inspire readers to continue to focus on their writing even when it is hard and they feel uninspired. 

2-23-24 The Proposal Plot - Kathleen Fuller - This is enjoyable Amish fiction about a headstrong young woman and her new neighbor who, after getting his heart broken badly, wants nothing to do with women. Unfortunately, his nephew and her sister fall in love, and they are recruited to chaperone them all too often. (Read for a book review publication)

2-24-24 ADHD for Smart Ass Women - Tracy Otsuka - I don't love the title of this book (it is based on the podcast of the same name), but the book itself was quite good. I read it to help understand / help my teenage daughter who has an ADHD brain. I recommend it to any women who have ADHD or have teenager daughters who have ADHD. It offers practical tips on time management, managing money, sleep challenges, exercise, and nutrition.

2-27-24 Our Lady of Good Help: Prayer Book for Pilgrims - Fr. Edward Looney - My mother gave me this book for Christmas and it is a lovely exploration of the Marian apparition at Champion, Wisconsin, in 1859. Fr. Looney describes the apparition, compares it with other Marian apparitions, and explains its message for all of us. The second half of the book is a collection of prayers including preparing to receive sacraments, novenas, and prayers for different locations at the National Shrine for those fortunate enough to make a pilgrimage there. 

 

3-6-23 Carnegie's Maid - Marie Benedict - I've read a few books by Marie Benedict over the years, but I had somehow missed this one. I'm so glad I picked it up! I thoroughly enjoyed this tale of a young Irish woman working as a lady's maid for Andrew Carnegie's mother and developing a relationship with her wealthy son. 

3-6-23 Mary's Calico Hope - Anne Blackburne - Mary Yoder was injured in an accident as a young child. Now age 29, she has accepted her fate and does as well as she can living in pain and going around on crutches. She would like to have a husband, though, if it is God's will. But when she falls in love with a Mennonite doctor who introduces her to a surgery that could change her life, she struggles to know what God's will might be.  Fans of Amish romance will enjoy this one!
 

Since spring of 2019, I have been making my way through the Great Books Curriculum of Thomas Aquinas College (I'm currently working on the readings for junior year). 

2-16-24 The Sense of Music - Victor Zuckerkandl - The next group of selections I am working on is on music. This particular book wouldn't be considered part of the "Great Book" canon, but was written to help students studying the Great Books to better understand music as listeners. I have a basic understanding of how to read music. I learned some when I was a child and I have been using the "Simply Piano" App for the past couple of years to try to learn how to play the piano better, which I enjoy and is good for exercising my brain. I did not understand everything in this book, but I learned many things about musical theory. 

2-29-24 Fundamentals of Music - Boethius - The author of this work lived from 480-524 and was examining the mathematical underpinnings of Western musical theory. He focused on translating Greek works on music and shaped the discipline of music during the middle ages. While the mathematical portions of this book were beyond me, I did understand some of the philosophical musings. 

3-9-24 Tonality - Molly Gustin - This is another relatively modern book (1969) and I was excited to see it was by a woman, a true rarity on this book list. She was writing to argue that seven-tone diatonic scales and better than 12 tone chromatic scales. She discussed tone, consonance, mode, key. pitch, meter, and aesthetics. I understood parts of it. In this journey through music, I have learned that music is much more complicated than I ever thought!

My thirteen-year-old daughter and I read the following book this month:

 

 

2-13-24 The Girl in the Lake - India Hill Brown - This one was a spine-tingler! While it was written for kids, there were moments I was quite spooked reading it. A group of cousins spend a week at their grandparents' house by the lake. Little do they know that the house is haunted. In addition to being a good story, it also had am important lesson on racism and why many Black people never were able to learn how to swim. 

 

 

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Contemplate Divine Mercy this Lent

 

Lent is the perfect time to reflect on the gift and message of Divine Mercy. Fr. Chris Alar is a member of the Marian Fathers of the Immaculate Conception, an order of priests who have made it one of their missions to spread the good news of Divine Mercy. In Understanding Divine Mercy, Fr. Alar explains the visions of Jesus that St. Faustina wrote about in her famous diary, Divine Mercy in My Soul, showing how the Divine Mercy message permeates Scripture and Catholic tradition. He also provides ways we can live and share that message in our own lives.

We are all sinners in need of God’s mercy. “Every time we sin, we bring disharmony into God’s universe” (8). This disharmony impacts not only our lives, but the world at large, contributing to wars and natural disasters. Contemplating that reality is enough to make a person feel hopeless, but in spite of the sad state of the world, there is hope. “God knows we are suffering as a result of our sins, and He wants to help. . . . God loves us, and He wants to forgive and heal us. He wants to have mercy on us” (9). God sent His Son to redeem us and the Holy Spirit to sanctify us.

Fr. Alar describes the blessings of the sacrifice of the Mass and the Sacrament of Reconciliation. He also offers simple ways to remember the key tenets of the Divine Mercy message and the five “channels of grace” to help us live out this message. The acronyms “ASK” and “FINCH” are easy to recall, and each of these components is then explained in detail.

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A – Ask for God’s Mercy.

B – Be merciful to others.

C – Completely Trust in God’s Mercy.

 

F – Feast of Divine Mercy

I – Image of Divine Mercy

N – Novena of Divine Mercy

C – Chaplet of Divine Mercy

H – Hour of Divine Mercy

 

Some people struggle to understand or accept that God is loving and merciful because of the suffering in the world (I have experienced doubt because of this). Fr. Alar tackles that problem, explaining how suffering can be a source of blessing when it is offered up for others and we persevere through our difficulties. “The enemy will use our suffering and crosses to try to lead us to despair, but hold fast—we all have to go through these tests . . . we need to ask [God] for the grace to persevere, for the grace to be able to carry our cross with His help” (139-140). Fr. Alar reminds us that “in every storm, Jesus is present” (149).

Fr. Alar also discusses what we can do if we fear for a loved one’s salvation. He emphasizes that is never too late to pray for someone’s soul, even if they died many years ago, because God exists outside of time.

Whether you are familiar with the Divine Mercy message and devotion or this is your first time hearing about it, Understanding Divine Mercy is a book well worth reading and contemplating. 

 

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