I Don't Need You!

Author Note: This was an article I wrote a while back and tried to have published in a print publication. Unfortunately, I had no luck (sigh!), so I decided to use it for my weekly Catholic Mom and Catholic Exchange column this week since I am buried in work and just didn't have the heart to write an article today. I hope you enjoy it. Thankfully, since the time this was written, Isaac has decided that he needs a mother after all. :)

My five-year-old son has decided he no longer needs a mother. He tells me this almost every day. Of course, I can see the humor in the situation as he stands there telling me “I can take care of myself” while he has his clothes on backward and still needs me to pour his milk for him!

It is natural for children to want to be independent. Indeed, my son's outbursts are all part of the process that will lead to him eventually leaving home and living an adult life of his own. Unfortunately, as we grow up, we sometimes think that not only do we no longer need our earthly parents to take care of us, but also that we don't need our Father in heaven, either.

It is so easy to think that we can make it on our own. This is especially true when life is going well: when everyone is healthy; we have people to love us; we have a solid roof over our heads, and a good job to go to every day. How many times have we ignored God in situations like this? Maybe we still continue going to mass each week and say some routine prayers, but do so more out of habit than out of any real desire to be with God. Maybe we forget God altogether and put our faith on the back burner. Maybe we put all our faith in the next technological development. Who needs God when we can have a car that recognizes voice commands or a phone that gives us access to the internet with the touch of our finger? Maybe we put our faith in our friends and family, trusting that they will always be there for us. Who needs God when we have a loving home to return to at the end of the day? Who needs God when we have friends we can call at 3:00 am?

Indeed, who needs God? Aren't we just like the child staunchly maintaining that “We don't need a Father?” We tell God that we don't need someone to look out for us. Life is good. We can do this all on our own. Can't you see God shaking his head, laughing? “She thinks she can make it on her own! This coming from a person who can't keep the sun in the sky, or make it rain, or create the air that she breathes, or heal her child of sickness. Ha! She would not even be able to think if I did not give her the ability to do so. She would not be able to love. She would not even be here except that I loved her and willed her into being. What could she possibly be thinking?” We are standing there with our pants on backward.

But then, life falls apart. The job gets outsourced. Our savings dwindle. The “new” technology becomes old within days. The prognosis from the doctor is not good. The family member dies. The friend moves on. Suddenly, like the child who cries out for his mother to help him, we do need God. We remember that we have a Father in heaven who loves us and we get down on our knees and pray. We reach out. We ask others to reach out! We realize that there are many things in our world that we do not control and that we need a higher power to help us out. We realize that we can't do it on our own.

Yes, we all want to be independent at times. We want to be in control of our destinies, masters of our domain. There are many things that we do control. God gave us free will and we do make many choices in life that shape the journey. But we can never forget that we need God. Even when life is going well, we still need to pray, to get in touch with God, to listen to his Word. We need to remember that without God, this great big beautiful world would not exist. We would not exist.

My five-year-old can do many things on his own. He is learning more and more each day. But, whether he realizes it or not, he still needs me. So it is with us and God. Even on the days we feel like we don't need Him, he is there, loving us, providing for us, waiting patiently for us to acknowledge His place in our lives.