Friday, November 29, 2019

Help for When You Feel Like Less Than Enough


If you have a strong sense of self-worth, please feel free to stop reading this now. On the other hand, if you struggle with feeling worthy of love or frequently compare yourself to others, only to find yourself lacking, please know that you are not alone.

 In Enough as You Are: Overcoming Self-Doubt and Appreciating the Gift of You, long-time Catholic writer Peggy Weber shares her own story of feeling unworthy. "How many times I have felt unworthy in my life, not just of God's love but of love from others, too, and how many times I have failed to love myself . . . I have spent a lot of time wondering if I am any-number-of-things enough. . . I should have figured out a long time ago that God loves even me and that, all along, I am enough."

Weber explores a number of ways in which we women tend to think we are not enough. We struggle to feel worthy of love, experience loneliness and being unwelcome, and wonder if we are smart enough, good enough, or holy enough. We sometimes think that we don't have enough material goods or that we are not impressive enough to other people. At other times, we may be drowning in the pain and suffering of hard times and feel like we simply don't have enough resources to cope. 

Weber speaks with honesty and the wisdom of years and perspective, sharing anecdotes from her own life to illustrate how she has faced each of these issues. She also offers spiritual wisdom, beginning each chapter with a quote from St. Frances de Sales and ending chapters with an Ignatian examen to aid in personal reflection.

As someone who has suffered from a poor sense of self-worth for much of my life, I could relate to so much in these pages. I often read while waiting for my daughter at her activities; I found myself crying while I read Enough as You Are while waiting outside of gymnastics, dance, and acting class.

No one book will cure you of your struggles with self-worth (I wish that it could), but Weber wrote this book so that you can "explore why you might also be comparing yourself to others, feeling inadequate, or wondering if you are enough." Understanding can help on the road to healing. So can prayer. It can also be helpful to know that you are not alone in how you feel. 

St. Francis de Sales said that you should "be who you are and be that perfectly well." Enough as You Are can help each of us who have a poor sense of self-worth to appreciate the gift of the person that God made us to be.

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